'WHAT'S NEXT?'

                                                -- an honest and rite question

To all the KING's men...
   + The man said the church was 'culpable' for the failure of his family.  "What's next?"
     + My friend tried to take his own life when he got fired at work.  "What's next?"
     + My nephew told me his girlfriend's pregnant.  He wants to know, "what's next?"
     + The young man just finished college.  The job market is thin.  "What's next?"
     + The men from our church just returned from a 'mission trip.'  "What's next?"

"What's next?"  It's always the right question to ask!  Whether it be asked in the AM on Monday after a restful holiday weekend, on Thursday at 4:45 PM with one more work day to go or at 10:30 PM on Friday as you climb into bed... "What's next?" is ALWAYS the question Lutheran Christian men ask in the middle of being servant-minded or as a new project, event or opportunity arises...

"What's next?"   I write this just about 10 days after returning from the National Lutheran Men in Mission Gathering in Denver, Colorado.  I'm encouraged by what I experienced, what I saw and heard and by remains in my heart now that I'm home and in my corner of God's kingdom...  So, "what's next?" is the nagging question in my head and heart and so I am asking you, too... 'what's next?"   NEXT for the Men in Mission in your congregation, NEXT for the men in your cluster of congregations and NEXT for the men in our synod...

In a recent memo to our men's ministry leaders in all three TX and LA synods I shared the following information and want all the men of our synod to know as well... pastors, AiMs, Youth & Family Ministry leaders, etc... what just happened and WHAT's NEXT!

  National LMM News

    A. Denver was fantastic... perhaps the best effort LMM has given us in a 12 years

            1.  Numbers were down 30% from previous 2 gatherings, but...

            2.  The average age of the assembly was lower also due to the work of the LMM Young Men's Council

            3.  We now have Bishop Hanson's ear... he stayed the whole time and preached us out on Sunday AM

            4. Almost 400 men were there... less than 20 pastors and only 3 bishops.  There needs to be a change in approach here...

                  NOTE: 2 years ago Saddleback Church (Rick Warren) 'cancelled a               men's ministry training for lack of registrants and this year the UMC               wanted to gather  500 men for their national gathering but cancelled it         when less than 75 registrations were received. ASTOUNDING NEWS!)

               

    B.  Emphasis for the "ONE YEAR to LIVE" retreat ...changing men's lives! More soon!

    C.  A site for 2014 has not been set; however talks of two gatherings (east and west) are          in the making.  We would be 'West.' This would be more work on planning teams but would reach more men overall.

II. Region 4 News

    A.  Region 4 has representation from all synods except OK-ARK and Central States 

            1.  Thanksgiving for the work of Henry Howe was acknowledged (more than once)

            2.  Tom Ness (from NTNL Synod) was elected our new Region 4 LMM REP over              another candidate from NE.  Both are committed to the ongoing work of LMM           

     B.  The three synods for TX-LA had young and older men in attendance;

            1.  From TX-LA Gulf Coast was me and Kenneth Peterson from New Life/Pearland; 

                   Chaplain Richard Brunk/Ft. Hood; Richard Baker/Christ. Brenham; Mark Dentler/Advent. Houston

            2.  Kyle Pederson (LMM Young Men's Ministry Specialist) sought out Kenneth Peterson @ New Life about reaching out to congregations in our synod re: LMM and seeking out the age 19-30 men.  Kenneth currently lives in NW Houston and will reach out to Pastor Brad Otto (Messiah/Cypress) as a first step. Then he can reach out to Celebration and connect w/ the men at Covenant & Living Word.

            3. A brief conversation was held in Denver at the Region 4 Caucus to consider having a REGION 4 gathering in Spring of 2013 as a 'pre-gathering to the Nat'l Gathering

III.  Gulf Coast LMM News

        A.  We continue to reach out to each other

            1.  Pastor, AiMs and Youth and Family ministers will need to keep talking... L M M!

        B. Facebook page needs some energy... we need to have a national LMM/FB push... where men all over the country log on to the local congregation/synod/national FB pages/groups

        C.  We have a weekend blocked off for a Men's Weekend @ Camp Lutherhill in LaGrange.  I spoke to Matt Kindsvatter and there is no program per/se so we have an opportunity here to promote and go... nice time of year to be there...

                1.  OR we could use Denver men to come here to lead a "One Year to Live" retreat;

                2.  But, Spring 2012 after Easter may work best

        D.  2012 Synod Meeting on the calendar!  EJ Hanhart has secured Christ the King LC/Kenner  LA for THRS - SUN FEB 9-12 for our annual synod gathering

                1.  In Brenham we spoke of doing it this way:

                    a. pre-gathering on THRS nite and leave early in the AM for a day's fishing trip for those who desired it

                    b. Friday nite gathering for all synod me @ CtK  (NOTE: this is also Mardi Gras season so we will need to stay on top of housing and airfare)

                    c.  This gathering has the intention of putting TX and LA men in the same room to build friendships for a return in July 2012 for the ELCA Youth Gathering.  Jessica Noonan in our synod is in charge of "service projects"

                2.  I met Rev. Jay Gamelin (campus pastor @ Ohio St) in Denver and he and I are talking about him coming to NOLA that weekend.  The best part of this event is to have the TX men stay in south LA to worship and have a lunch to talk about how we get back together in July.  Jay gave a great sermon in Denver and I think he is a classmate or knows Pastor Barb Simmers in Slidell.  Maybe he could preach there on Sunday?

                3. Evan Moilan could also come from LWR Malaria Initiative and bring more men in on this great opportunity!

That is what I know about where we are... KING's Men... "What's next for you?"  Please fill in the blanks... what are you doing in your congregation?  Your cluster?.... please drop me a note and I will forward it to those who need to know... 

Remember... if Lutheran Men in Mission in each congregation were 'a baseball' team ...only one of our 9 men would have a clear understanding of how we are, what we do and why... that's not good news...but it's the place we start...

One man @ a time; no man left behind,

     Brian

Coordinator, TX - LA Gulf Coast Synod Men's Ministry

"I'm OUT---You're OUT--We're All OUT!"

To all the KING'S men,

I've been thinking about this for a while...

The paradox of life and faith in God and we hold up the ways of the world and the ways of God...they don't always overlap and fall into place like those old plastic page overlays in the HUMAN BODY section of the Encyclopedia Brittanica...

Our thoughts and actions are challenged everyday...  what we do and what we say... and how we say it and the 'meanings' that accompany...

Like... 'good' is 'bad' and "hi, how are you?" is "Sup?" and 'chillin' has nothin' to do with the weather outside... and you can call someone 'Einstein' and most likely you're not referring to an IQ but rather...lack of one... and ... well you get the point...

Same goes for "I'm out"... and "You're out"... what this may mean for a game of Texas Hold 'Em or baseball...does not mean the same in Jesus' kingdom...
Consider John's gospel in the 10th chapter to see what I mean...  Jesus said to his friends...

"The one who enters by the gate is the shepherd of the sheep. 3The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep hear his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. 4When he has brought out all his own, he goes ahead of them, and the sheep follow him because they know his voice. 5They will not follow a stranger, but they will run from him because they do not know the voice of strangers.”

How many times have I read this before? How many times have you heard John's retelling of Jesus' insight shared with his friends?

Well, this is what I've been muddling over for days... in the midst of life and death and births and weddings, baptisms and burials and school years beginning and ending as well as hanging around with the Bishop at Synod Assembly ... putting  this 'listening' to Jesus and 'following' Jesus into a perspective that takes on meaningful-ness and bears fruit and... well... keep reading...

It's the verse 3 of John 10 that grabbed my heart in the public reading a Sunday ago... and it was just one word that poked me in the eye... and got wrapped around my heart...

v. 3  "The gatekeeper opens the gate for him, and the sheep hear his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out."

And ... you got it... the word that poked me in the eye is the word "OUT!" Jesus calls his sheep by name and then leads then "OUT!"  Wow!  This is the exact opposite of how so many men in the world "see" and "view" CHURCH... a boring place to go in... so they never hear about the OUT-ness of God's kingdom work we share...

Imagine that???  ... being "called out" and it being a really good thing... being 'called out' and in order to make a difference...

But that's how the gospel is... it's above and against as well as that thing of God which challenges our culture...the gospel supports and yet is contrary to the life that we call 'real life.' When I fold a hand in a game of Texas Hold 'Em I throw down my cards and say, "I'm out." It is a sign of defeat... a loss... at least for that round... or if I hit a sharp grounder to the 2nd baseman in a softball game...my old legs won't get me to the base faster than the throw and 99 chances out of 100 the umpire will call me OUT!... And again... I go down in flames... head hanging discouraged and quietly sulking in the dugout...

But, when Jesus leads us OUT and calls us by name and calls us OUT...it is a sign of victory and a 'branding' that we belong to him and he goes ahead of us to prepare the way and what that means he is pointing us out to others as we follow to serve...

It's what is said often in my congregation @ New Life... "This is God's house (the sheep pen) and we are God's people (named and known by the shepherd) claimed, gathered and sent (called out by the shepherd's voice) into the world (not gathered to stay in the church nave) with God's amazing grace..." (what the world needs and more than enough has been given to us!)

So, if you hear me say..."I'm OUT" or if you hear me say to you..."You're OUT"...then know it is a good thing... as it is at the heart of what work as Lutheran Men in Mission is all about... it is the reality that we can't sit still as we follow the shepherd who has gone ahead of us...

But, let the sheep beware... we will need to keep listening for his familiar voice as Jesus reminded his disciples that there will be other voices who will seek our time and attention and our loyalty...our very heart and soul and mind... maybe you have heard these other voices...maybe you have let them drown out the voice of Jesus and maybe you have even followed them... but that's where the 'beware' comes in...the 'other' voices will trick us...they will seduce us and they will invite us away from the voice and the life and the mission of Jesus and lead us away from the one who offers grace upon grace and lead us to sin, death and destruction... they will dress up 'selfishness' and they will lift up 'greed' and 'self-indulgence' only to make us full of ourselves and in the end find that life has been sucked out of us and snatched away... and we will feel LEFT OUT and we will die...

However, the voice of the shepherd will keep calling...calling our names...your name...my name... and when we hear it... we will remember to whom we belong and what our purpose in life is all about... and we will be OUT with good cause and we will make a difference in each day via the name of Jesus'...the one who makes ALL the difference in the world...

Now, I hope to have you thinking about this for a while... and thinking that you may want to talk to the men in your congregation about the OUT-ness we are all part of...

So, what is there to do?

1. Pray--be specific;
2. Talk to some men around you...find out what they need...respond;
3. Seek out some HS grads or college grads--find out who is starting a new job;
4. Look around your facilities.  Ask--- "are men 'welcome' here?"
5. Call all the 'dads' in your congregation and ask them to be at worship JUNE 19;
6. Plan a "men's day" Sunday this Fall;
7. How will you honor the military vets in your congregtation this NOV?
8. Do you have a men's study year round plan?  Why?  Why not?

Blessings to you these Summer months...and do let me know what is happening with men's ministry in your corner of the Kingdom...

     Brian

MAN HOLES--- "Danger Zone --Menwork in Progress"

WHAT IS GOING ON IN A MAN’S LIFE?
(Part 1)

Comments for 50+ years old OR Asking ‘How is a man defined?’ and "What are the danger zones?"

If Lent is that season of the church year where a man gets to take a second or third look in the mirror, then perhaps this post is timely as the time of Lent 2011 is closing in on Holy week. These are comments that flow from a conversation I had at the Dixie Chicken in College Station with my good friend Steve, whom I’ve known since I was a college freshman at Texas Lutheran University. I was 18; he was 19 and now we are in our late 50’s. Perhaps we may have 15-20 good years left in us; perhaps not. We are not consumed with our past nor fearful of the future so these comments are about the here and now as ‘faithfulness’ is only reviewed in the present! A second post will address the lives of men age 20 -40.

So, what is going on the life of a man 57 or 67 or 80? How are we defined?  Are there danger zones...'man holes' left uncovered that when not paying attention to the way or faith and the road of life we can fall in to ?

Here's our list....

• Family (of origin AND current circumstance)
• We are raised a certain way and all we know is what we know.  Is it enough?
• When we leave home all we know about family is either affirmed or challenged. This is both a good and creative time to accept and nurture
• As we grow older we seek to pass on the best our families have given
• Work (top tier of earning power)
• Older men are often amazed at the ‘entitled’ attitudes of younger men who desire to have everything their fathers and grandfathers spent a lifetime working toward.
• There comes a time in a man’s life when he arrives at this upper tier that he desires to do the things in life he enjoys…the things he is very passionate about and allow others to do the things he has done effectively and can be done well by others; and
• Someone suggests he ‘find a hobby,’ and create a ‘bucket list!’
• Value System (intact/corrupted/adapted)
• Men do not often really know what they believe and what is truly faithful and important until confronted with a choice that challenges their value system already living inside;
• Some men make choices they regret and spend the latter years of their lives trying to unravel a messy life;
• Other men trust their mentors…stay on a narrow path and reap a harvest in their later years for just plain doing the right thing.  There is a certain 'contentment that lives in a man's heart here which can and does breed confidence to others.
• Physical Condition (Aging/declining + brain body issues)
• With each day we get closer to death. This reality cannot be halted;
• Men can, however, make healthy choices about food, alcohol and tobacco use to add days to life; and
• Good friends will be on the lookout for one another throughout the seasons of a man’s life and offering both challenge and support along the way.
• Finitude (redeeming 'wasted time' vs. ending well)
• We have the promise of an abundant life as we walk in the path of Jesus;
• Even though few of us live to 100 or older, our fear of death has a huge impact on our quality of daily life and the life we choices we make;
• A man’s grasp of ‘grace’ and ‘forgiveness’ or lack of will have a great impact on trying to redeem wasted time or end that life well.
• Friends (How many? Where?)
• The older a man gets the more he realizes how blessed he has been by having faith-filled and genuine friends;
• Deeper friendships are few but cherished and bring a greater quality of life vs. having many friends of little substance;
• Friendship should never be about the last man standing. A man may lose other friends prior to his own death; but hopefully there will be younger men who grieve at the time of his death.
• Legacy (how will I be remembered?—Spouse, children, family, friends, God?)
• Most men will not have a road or building name in their honor;
• Most men will, however, leave a life-time of love and witness to many;
• In the cemetery in Columbus, TX a tombstone stands with this epitaph: “Here lies the body of Ike Towell—no hope of heaven and no fear of hell.” What will others say about you?
• What has God already promised you? Is that enough?

For further conversation and consideration...

MAN HOLES (dangerous circumstances for aging men and not in any particular order)

1. Living in a “culture of youth” vs. seeing ‘aging’ as a natural journey of life;

2. The ‘Denial of Death’ complicates participation/surviving this culture of youth;

3. Distortion of Priorities/Values causing of sense of “uprooting” from past;

4. Fear of other’s opinions—lack of self-definition and “needing approval”

5. Lack of integrity is characteristic of a non-integrated person;

6. Lack of desire to grow and become strong and remain “well;”

7. Unclear as to the value of “grace” and forgiveness;”

        a. Lack of “ritual” and “community” are key contributors to this lack

8. Unclear how to deal with “guilt and shame;”

9. Unresolved GRIEF is a key factor in the “troubling” behavior a man;

10. There is a high lack of any sense of “blessedness” in the American male;

11. As a man grows older he is more aware of his own “failure;”

        a. “We don’t fear failure; we fear success because it forces us to be responsible”

12. Most men are uncertain how and why “change” is a critical part of life’s journey;

        a. “We don’t think ourselves into a new behavior; we behave our way into a new way of thinking.”
                                                                                                                                   -Fr. Richard Rohr
13. How many friends does a man have by age 6o?

What will the men in your church and at your office coffee pot talk about today?  Tomorrow?  After Easter?

 

A blessed Holy Week to all of you.  Jesus went into Jerusalem with purpose.  He felt that anquish of having one last meal with his closest friends.  He sweat drops of blood trying to be faithful to his father.  And his way of being king and savior was to give in to the power and glory of God.  Here is THE example and model of the Godly life---Jesus of Nazareth the one who points to the man holes of life...walks over and around them and says to us..."follow me."

 

   Brian